Merry Christmas my adoring public!
I apologize for neglecting you recently…holidays, ya know? With that being said lets move on to a brand new installment of Christmas culture, the one, the only, Frank Cross!
Frank Cross is played by Bill Murray in (probably) my favorite Christmas movie: Scrooged. For those who haven’t seen it, it’s just a modernized “Christmas Carol”. It’s about a powerful TV executive who mistreats his employees, and sports a general distain for the holidays and the human race alike.
Just like the original, it’s a tale of personal redemption that starts with a visit from Frank’s old (and like minded) boss…..fyi he’s a ghost now and as part of his penitence is to appear to Frank on earth and help him with the transition from hell bound douche bag to holiday hero.
From here it’s business as usual (visits from the ghosts of past, present, future), but done in a much more entertaining and less creepy way than the 1984 version. While we’re on that topic, why was that Ghost of Christmas Present a 7 foot ginger in a green bathrobe who kept children under said robe? I don’t know about you but that guy weirded the fuck out of me.
Back on point. Frank Cross and Ebenezer Scrooge share some distinct similarities, the most important being: they’re assholes. But not just your everyday runs of the mill assholes. That doesn’t seem to be enough to inspire an intervention from beyond the grave. No, these guys were once nice caring individuals who were molded into self aware pillars of the douche bag community. They know they are dickheads, they like it, and they profit from acting that way. The story seems to be about the loss of compassion, and the corruption of power (two things that really piss ghosts off during the holidays!).
Don’t worry, even though Frank had spent years straying from the path of kindness and charity, his soul is still saved. All it took was a glimpse into the future, and a personal meltdown. Once again this proves that it’s never too late for anyone…what a great Christmas message.
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.


Comments