The Steve-Dave Reality Tour

Classic TV 101: Biker Mice from Mars

Biker Mice from Mars was a cartoon TV show that followed three anthropomorphic mice motorcyclists named Throttle, Modo, and Vinnie who escaped a war on their home planet Mars before arriving to defend the Earth from the evil that destroyed their homeland (the Plutarkians) and to one day return to Mars.

It ran from 1993 to 1996 for a total of 65 episodes.

The team was comprised of:

Throttle - The leader-figure of the trio with tan fur. Throttle's vision was damaged in the same incident that caused the losses of Modo's arm and the right side of Vinnie's face. As a result he wears green sunglasses with field spec capabilities. His sight does not appear to have been damaged completely, as he is able to look through a telescope in "Back to Mars" (current fan theories state that he can see without his shades for limited periods of time). On his right hand he wears a battle glove (coined "Nuke Knucks") which increases the strength of his blows with that fist. His first symbolic quote in the series was, "In this wild and woolly universe, there are three things you can count on: your brains, your bros and your bike!"

Modo  - The gentle giant of the three with gray fur and an eye-patch, suggesting that his eye may have been damaged during Karbunkle's experiments. He lost his right arm in the same incident that burned off the right side of Vinnie's face and damaged Throttle's vision. His robotic arm replacement has a built-in laser cannon and has great strength. When angry his right eye flashes red. He is prone to fits of rage when he or his bros are referred to as 'rats'. He is by far the strongest of the three mice, but also seems to have the most obvious capacity to love (Vinnie's attempts are often considered to be flirting). His bike is the only one out of the three with a definite name ("Lil' Hoss"), and the one with the most demonstrated AI capability. His first signature quote was "My momma didn't raise no stinkin' rat!"

Vinnie - Self-proclaimed lady-killer with white fur. The right side of his face was burned off in the same incident where Throttle's vision was damaged and where Modo lost his right arm; thus, Vinnie wears a flexible faceplate. He rides a red racing Sport bike, and is a thrill-seeker, often volunteering for the most dangerous tasks, enjoying the rush and subsequent glory. He wears a green X-cross bandolier on his chest, and wields expanding flares as well. His bike seems to have the greatest arsenal of weaponry between the three, and he is the best overall biker of the trio. He has a recurring catchphrase, "What a rush!", and has a signature laugh of triumph.

Charlene "Charley" Davidson  - The Mice are always backed up by Charley, a human mechanic who owns the Last Chance Garage in Chicago. She is also responsible for upgrades on the bros' bikes and is a high-tech genius in her own right.

Enjoy the video intro.

Classic TV 101: C.O.P.S.

C.O.P.S. (Central Organization of Police Specialists) was a cartoon television show, which ran from 1988–1989, and used the tag line: "Fighting crime in a future time, protecting Empire City from Big Boss and his gang of crooks". There were a total of 65 episodes.

I wish this show had lasted longer then it did. C'est la vie.

Here's the breakdown...

The year: 2020. The place: Empire City. The situation: Brandon “Big Boss” Babel (along with his gang of crooks) is holding the entire city under the palm of his iron hand and the Empire City Police Department can do nothing to stop him. As a last resort, Mayor Davis sends in Special Agent Baldwin P. Vess (Codename: Bulletproof) to take him down. However, Bulletproof suffered very serious injuries in a car wreck during a fight with Big Boss' criminal henchmen and had to be taken to the hospital, where he is given a cybernetic bullet-resistant torso to save his life as it would take years for his torso to recover.

While staying at the hospital, Bulletproof, knowing he cannot do all of this alone recruits police officers from all over the country. This was one of the most diverse and comprehensive crime-fighting forces ever portrayed in any fictional setting that I've seen.

• P.J. O'Malley (Codename: LongArm) - The Beat Cop
• Donny Brooks (Codename: HardTop) - The Patrol and Pursuit Officer
• David E. Harlson (Codename: "Highway") - The Motorcycle Patrol Officer
• Colt Howards  (Codename: "Mace") - The S.W.A.T. Officer
• Stan Hyde (Codename: "Barricade") - The Riot Control and Hostage Negotiation Officer
• Tina Cassidy (Codename: "Mainframe") - The Police Technical Analyst
• Walker Calhoun (Codename: "Sundown") - The Texas Ranger
• Suzie Young (Codename: "Mirage") - The Vice Officer
• Hugh S. Forward (Codename: "Bullseye") - The Police Helicopter Pilot
• Rex Pointer (Codename: "Bowser") and his robot dog, Blitz   - The K-9 Officer
• Baldwin P. Vess (Codename: "Bulletproof") - The FBI Agent / Detective

The team is dubbed as “the finest law enforcement agency there is in the country.”

Bulletproof becomes the proud founder and commander of C.O.P.S.

Together, he and his C.O.P.S. team are able to take down Big Boss and his gang of crooks and thwart the first of many of Big Boss' criminal schemes.

The show's futuristic setting looked incredibly like the 1920s with a modern spin.

Check out this very memorable and iconic opening theme.

Classic TV 101: Ghostbusters (of the not so "real" variety)

Who you gonna' call? Not these guys.

Ghostbusters was cartoon TV show based on a live-action television show from 1975-1976 titled The Ghost Busters.

This is a direct follow-up to my previous blog where I covered that oher Ghostbusters cartoon. The two franchises are not related other than their name. This show forced the other to tack "real" onto their name.

This cartoon ran from 1986 to 1987 for a total of 65 episodes. I'm a little unsure how they did that may episodes in such a short time.

At first, I didn't remember there being a second "Ghostbusters" cartoon. However, upon doing my research and watching the clip below it all came back to me in a flash. Perhaps it will for you too.

Jake Kong, Eddie Spenser and Tracy the Gorilla are The Ghost Busters. Why they had a gorilla on the team is a matter I'm not clear on. There were plenty of people looking for jobs during the 1980s recession is unclear and outrageous to me.

Apparently, Tracy is extremely smart and is credited with inventing all of the "Ghostbusting gadgets". Tracy is also very powerful and uses his strength to get out of tight spots. Unlike the live-action series where he only wore various hats (most commonly a beanie), in this series, he wears a fedora, backpack and khaki shorts....

Planet of the Apes come to mind for anyone else?

Together, they have dedicated themselves to ridding the world of the evil ghost wizard Prime Evil and his cast of henchmen.

Anyways, the wraps up my two-part special on all cartoons "Ghostbusters". Well, that't not exactly true. There are a few other spin-offs, but they dreadful and will not be brought up anytime soon.

Peace!

Classic TV 101: The Real Ghostbusters

The Real Ghostbusters was a cartoon TV show based on the 1984 film, Ghostbusters.

It ran from 1986 to to 1991 on ABC and had total of 147 episodes.

The "Real" moniker was in reference to another Ghostbusters cartoon, which I'll cover in my next blog.

This was a staple of 1980s cartoon watching for any boy (and some girls, I'm sure).

The series continues the adventures of paranormal investigators Dr. Peter Venkman, Dr. Egon Spengler, Dr. Ray Stantz, Winston Zeddemore, their secretary Janine Melnitz and their mascot ghost Slimer.

Of the original movie cast, only Ernie Hudson auditioned to play his character (Zeddemore) in the series; however, as a very special "fuck you" to Ernie Hudson, the role was given to Arsenio Hall. I'm not sure what Hudson did to piss off the producers but it must have been pretty bad to get your role taken away by Arsenio.

The role of Peter Venkman was split between Garfield himself, Lorenzo Music, and goofy fuck-wad extrordinaire, Dave Coulier. If you will remember, Coulier was the Full House star that received fellatio in a theatre from Alanis Morrissette. But I digress...

When I was a kid this show was what life was all about. The characters didn't look (or even act) very much like their movie counerparts. They wore different coloured jumpsuits... I suppose so we could tell them apart. Egon became a blonde (actually, all of the characters were redesigned). The character of Slimer was reinvented as well. Oh yeah, and a metric ton of licensed merchandise was released including toys, clothes, toy slime...and the list keeps on going.

While doing research for this blog I realized that Babylon 5 creator,  J. Michael Straczynski, was a writer for this show for several years. That was a nice surprise.

 A few years ago, it was advertised that they were going to start doing reruns of this old favourite of mine on some cartoon network. As I was watching an episode back I realized that the show wasn't really that good... at least for an adult.

However, you can't fight the memory and I'll hold a special place for the "real" Ghostbusters in my heart.

Classic TV 101: Spider-Man

Spider-Man was a cartoon TV show starring the Marvel Comics superhero, Spider-Man.

The series focuses on Peter Parker during his college years at Empire State University. As the story begins, Peter has already gained his superpowers and is a part-time freelance photographer for the Daily Bugle.

The show was fairly faithful to the source materials but a lot of things were changed and updated for modern presentation. For example, Hobgoblin appears before Green Goblin, rather than vice versa as it should be.

The show features most of Spider-Man's classic villains, including the Kingpin, the Green Goblin, the Lizard, the Scorpion, Doctor Octopus, Mysterio, Shocker, the Rhino, the Vulture, the Chameleon, and Venom. Over the course of the series the single Peter contends with the romantic love interests of Mary Jane Watson, Felicia Hardy and her alter ego, the Black Cat.

The series also features numerous crossovers by other Marvel Comics characters, including the X-Men, the Fantastic Four, Iron Man, Daredevil, Blade, the Punisher, and Captain America. 

Even the Clone Saga, with Ben Reilly, was touched upon briefly in one episode.

The show ran on Fox Kids from November 19, 1994, to January 31, 1998 for a total of 65 episodes.

This show got me hooked on Spider-Man. I can remember every episode of the series with clarity. From there I started reading the books pretty regularily and cemented the character among my favourite comic heroes ever.

I believe it to be one of the greatest cartoons ever produced. It certainly reinvented the way to present a comic book with an ongoing story arch that abandoned the campiness that 1960s counterparts were laced with.

The instrumental theme song for the series (including the lyrics) was performed by Joe Perry of Aerosmith. Very memorable.

Classic TV 101: DuckTales

Duck Tales was a cartoon television show that ran from 1987 to 1990 for a total of 100 episodes. 

"Life is like a hurricane...here in, Duckburg!"

It reimagined Disney's Uncle Scrooge comic book storyline into a new format and backstory. It paved the way for other Disney cartoons like it such as Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers and TaleSpin.

The show features the adventures of Scrooge McDuck and his great-nephews, Huey, Dewey, and Louie. The nephews, who were originally living with their uncle Donald Duck, are left in Scrooge's care when the former joins the Navy. I guess that Donald Duck was a sailor so this makes sense. However, could it possibly be a commentary on Donald's sexuality? Was Daisy Duck merely a beard? She never made an appearance on this show that I'm aware of. Think about it.

Anyway...

Though Scrooge is the richest duck in the world, he constantly tries to find ways to increase his wealth. Stories shifted between globetrotting adventures and the contemporary setting of Duckburg (where they all live).  

Scrooge's nemesis in the show is Flintheart Glomgold, who always tries to devise plans to dethrone Scrooge McDuck from his "Richest Duck in the World" title. A few of the stories also surround Scrooge's "Number One Dime" which is the source of Scrooge's good luck and wealth. Scrooge keeps the dime in a glass jar in his money vault, and constantly protects it from the villains on the show.

Scrooge's household also consists of his butler, Duckworth; Mrs. Beakley, a nanny hired to look after Huey, Dewey and Louie; and Webby Vanderquack, the granddaughter of Mrs. Beakley.

Some episodes focused on other characters like Launchpad McQuack, Gyro Gearloose or Gizmo Duck. DuckTales also spawned spin-off series Darkwing Duck.

One of my favourite shows of my childhood. Thre was a wicked video game based on this show that I played on DOS when I was a kid as well. It was called DuckTales: The Quest for Gold.

Enjoy the fun intro song.

Classic TV 101: Tiny Toon Adventures

Tiny Toon Adventures was a cartoon television series set in the fictional town of Acme Acres, where most of the Tiny Toons and Looney Tunes characters live.

There were 102 episodes produced between 1990 and 1995.

The characters attended Acme Looniversity, a school whose faculty primarily consists of the mainstays of the classic Warner Bros. cartoons, such as Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Sylvester the Cat and Elmer Fudd.

It mainly featured Buster Bunny and Babs Bunny, who happened to be boyfriend and girlfriend also. Since they are at University, we can safely assume that they are quite experimental with their sexuality. The term "fucking like rabbits" comes to mind.

In the series, the university was founded to teach cartoon characters how to become funny.

Like the Looney Tunes, the series was derived from cartoon violence (e.g. anvils falling on someone, liberal use of explosives) and slapstick. 

The intro was hilarious but the show was sort of lacking for me in a lot of ways.

It was vastly more entertaining than the original Looney Tunes, which I loathe. I know I won't win a lot of friends with a comment like that. I just think the original show was too period specific. Some of those original animations were from the 1930s.

This show was better and more contemporary. It just wasn't great.

I do enjoy the part with Gogo Dodo.

Classic TV 101: Sailor Moon

Sailor Moon was a cartoon I watched in the 1990s and continues to be an ongoing media franchise featuring the concept of a team of magical girls with (among others) manga, anime and video game applications.

The protagonist of Sailor Moon, Serena Tsukino, an ordinary ditzy 14-year-old girl discovers a talking cat named Luna, who reveals her identity as "Sailor Moon", a special warrior with the destiny of saving the planet Earth, and later the entire galaxy. 

This was one of my favourite shows. Yes, it's girly but who cares? I do like musicals as well so I doubt this comes as a surprise to many.

This show was killer.

These characters were fun to watch. They included:

Sailor Moon - Soldier of Love and Justice (AKA The Dumbass One). Wields the all-powerful Silver Crystal - a family heirloom from Moon Kingdom. An immature crybaby who hates having to fight evil and wants nothing more than to be a normal girl.

Sailor Mercury - Soldier of Water and Wisdom (AKA The Brainy One...my personal favourite). A quiet, fourteen-year-old bookworm with a rumored IQ of 300. Also be considered the "tech girl" of the group by using her mini data computer, which is capable of scanning and detecting virtually anything she needs.

Sailor Mars - Soldier of Fire and Passion (AKA The Bitchy One). She attends a private, Catholic school separate from the other girls. Constantly gets into fights with Sailor Moon. Because of her work as a Shinto priestess, Rei has limited precognition and can dispel/nullify evil using special Shinto scrolls, even in her civilian form.

Sailor Jupiter - Soldier of Strength and Lightning and with some control over plants (AKA The Butch One). A fourteen-year-old tomboy who is very tall and very strong. A big lighting rod comes out of her tiara.

Sailor Venus - Soldier of Love and Beauty (AKA The Hot One). A fourteen-year-old perky dreamer. She has a companion cat called Artemis who works alongside Luna in guiding the Sailor Scouts. 

There were other Sailor Scouts but I never got that far into the series.

Tuxedo Mask - Throws roses as darts (AKA The Emo Boytoy One). Main love interest of Sailor Moon. He was also the Moonlight Knight for a while.

Talking cats, girls in short skirts with superpowers, science fiction and a wacky Japanese interpretation of Western Culture. What more could you want?

Enjoy.

Classic TV 101: Super Mario Bros. Super Show!

The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! was a live-action television show featuring a cartoon based upon Nintendo's Super Mario Bros. and Super Mario Bros. 2 video games.

It originally ran from September 4, 1989, to December 1, 1989 with syndication upto 1994 for a total of 52 episodes.

The Super Mario Bros. cartoons aired four days a week, from Monday through Thursday. Fridays were for The Legend of Zelda which was featured in my previous blog.

The first and last parts of each episode were sitcom segments which showed Mario (Lou Albano...the wrestler) and Luigi (Danny Wells...the Canadian voice actor) living in Brooklyn, where they would often be visited by celebrity guest stars.

Each Super Mario Bros. cartoon served as the second segment of every show, following the introduction and first few minutes of the episode's live-action segment. Each episode featured Mario, Luigi, Toad and Princess Toadstool defending the Mushroom Kingdom from the reptilian villain King Koopa, often in a movie or pop-culture parody. Getting into the spirit of these parodies, Koopa often used alter egos fitting the current theme. 

Occasionally, Lou Albano and Danny Wells would portray themselves, forcing their regular characters to leave the scene in order for themselves to appear. One notable example is when pop star Cyndi Lauper states she's looking for Lou Albano because he's missing, due to the note she got from him (although there is an important part missing from the note). Mario exclaims how much he wants to meet Lou, and later Lou appears as himself supposedly while Mario's out shopping for pizza. As a result, Luigi gets to meet Lou, but Mario does not.

The cartoon marks an early appearance of Birdo as a female, a change made after an odd description of Birdo was given in the manual of Super Mario Bros. 2. She has been female ever since.

Lou Albano and Danny Wells also regularly played female versions of themselves, Marianne (mother of Mario and Luigi) and Luigeena (their aunt), and also two hillbilly cousins, named Mario Joe and Luigi Bob.

This show was fantastic and a great adaptation of the aforementioned video games they were based upon. We picked this up on DVD for my kid and he'll watch them over and over until they wear out forever.

Classic TV 101: The Legend of Zelda

The Legend of Zelda was a cartoon television show based on the Japanese first and second The Legend of Zelda games for the Nintendo Entertainment System, airing from September 8 to December 1, 1989 for only 13 episodes.

It was featured as part of The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! - which will be looked at in the next blog posting.

Each episode follows the adventures of Link and Princess Zelda as they defend the kingdom of Hyrule from an evil wizard named Ganon. Most episodes consist of Ganon either attempting to capture the Triforce of Wisdom from Zelda, kidnap Zelda herself, or use another method to conquer Hyrule.

A common running joke of the series is Link's repeated failure to convince Zelda that he deserved a kiss for his heroic deeds; whenever it seems they are going to kiss, something bad will happen.

Ah, this was the show that really got me into the Zelda lore and from there onto one of the greatest video games of all time, Ocarina of Time.

My favourite part was how Link shot laser beams from his sword.

The sexual tension between Link and Zelda was put right out on Front Street for everyone to observe. The concept of "hard to get" was pushed throughout on the ongoing plot between these pointy-eared sprite. Perhaps they will bring this show back for the inevitable adult-themed conclusion.